No right to Mourn

I have an entire post about this coming soon, just taking me some time to get my thoughts down.  I feel like a lot of times when I post it's ramblings-something that most people I guess just post on Facebook to get it out of their system.  I like to post here, so it's intentional if you read it-not just something that pops into your feed.

I have no right to mourn this loss, but I feel as though I am in a small way.  I was not married to Gavin's father anymore-we had long divorced.  I didn't have a relationship with him either due to the way his life had taken a turn.  Hell his children didn't even have a relationship with him.  He made it hard on the ones he loved and who loved him towards the end of his life.

But having said that, I still feel a great sadness with knowing he is gone, that he has passed away.  Even in just writing that, I am crying-but trying to stop myself from those feelings due to the fact that I shouldn't be taking stock in that grief, it's not for me to have right?

I just feel sad every day when I think about it, and start crying just out of the blue.  I imagine I am just going to have to sit down, cry this out & get on with it.

Well that's all I want to say for now about it, I'll post the longer version soon!