Home with Lela: Xander

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Saturday, December 07, 2019

Happy "Almost" Holidays!

So, the unthinkable happened. My camera stopped functioning during a little mini session with my kiddos. This caused me to have to turn down a few photo sessions this fall-which sucks because everyone loves a little extra cash around the holidays.

But the good news is, I did manage to get a few cute pics of the kids & the camera is fixable (away being fixed now) so in the meantime, please take a look at the photos I got of my sweet babes..(the ones left in the nest anyway). As you can see from the photos-only one was willing to "model" for me lol

District Champs - Off to State

What a hot ass weekend, sitting out melting in the Florida heat was worth it to see my son and his team will districts in their 2019 All-Stars Tournament. Off to state we go in Live Oak in just a few weeks. This is our last year playing rec ball-so this is just amazing & what a great year we've had.

These Three

It is so hard to get good pictures of the kids lately. One doesn't want to smile, one doesn't want to find clothes that are not stretched out and one is mostly cooperative. My time with this is short, they are growing up so fast-the days go by and before I know it, it's been a year and I have not photographed the boys together with their sister, or the boys at all (they simply hardly allow it). I am enjoying every second I can with them, but I want to photograph them too! Soooo on our way to swim at Maw's house one day-we drove by the river and snapped a few of them! Gosh they are a cute mess.

First Day of School 2018

G, W, X & Miss O

Our mini vacation with Gavin is coming to an end, he'll be leaving for North Carolina Saturday morning - so this is our last week with him. Sucks that I have to work, but things are so crazy at the office right now and I already have vacation scheduled for the first two weeks of July! So we'll have to plan to go see him in his new town......I am sure I'll love North Carolina. :)

The other day, Gavin decided last minute to go visit a friend who was traveling through town (a guy he met in Alaska). He hadn't been gone more then two minutes when Olivia piped up and said "I miss Gavin". I laughed a bit and reminded her he had just left - and how he'd be back soon and she reminded me again how much she missed him still. I asked her what she was going to do when he left on Saturday for North Carolina and she simply said (and she meant it) "FREAK OUT!"....I tried hard not to laugh-but how sweet is that child? We will all miss him.

On Monday I took the kids to lunch and run a few errands. They graced me with a few smiles-and here is our outcome :)

xoxo, Lela

Honest Words from X

Being told that you're the best thing that has ever happened to someone is amazing to hear from anyone, but being told that by a child - it really is priceless.

Last night, after dinner, X came up to me and said "Lela, I love you so much - you'll never know how much. You're the best thing that could have ever happened to me and I don't know what I'd do without you, I never want to be without you!" All I could do was hug him to keep from crying.

I knew being a mom was a calling that I would never not answer. I never knew that I would be a step mom, never envisioned that as my life. I always thought I'd marry the man of my dreams, we'd have a bunch of children & then grow old together. Life handed me another option, more choices, tough choices in leaving my children's dads...and marring a man with a child. Sometimes it's hard, sometimes it's really really hard and I have wanted to give up more times then I'd like to admit - but I didn't, and just when you think you're not noticed - bam, they hit you right in the feels.....and bring you back to "I appreciate you status". I love this kid, more then HE'LL ever know. I choose to love you and you me. It's a bond that won't be broken! Can't wait to see what you do with this life kiddo!

Cedar Key for the Day

This Kid.

He's been in trouble lately because of his report card & he's had to earn time to watch TV, play on his phone and do extra things like spend the night with a friend.

While we were waiting to celebrate Macen's birthday party.....I gave Xander some free time to watch TV....lol, he really enjoyed it!

W & Baseball

This week has been try outs for middle school baseball for our boys. X&W both tried out this year, last year only X tried out (and made the team). I have been anxiously waiting to hear from W to see if he made the team this year, because they find out today. He text me a few moments ago to tell me that 12 out of 22 kids were picked for the team this year, most if not all was from last year, and he was not one of them.

I am not the kind of parent that thinks every child deserves a trophy for everything they do in life, but I do think that children should be picked for teams based on ability & they should also not be told that they'll make the team - and then not be picked - lied to. He's so disappointed, and doesn't even want to play baseball anymore. I don't even know how to talk to him about it, and I don't know how to navigate my feelings towards both boys dealing with the same try outs with totally different results.

My heart aches for Weston....because I know how much he wanted it & how confident he was that he was going to make the team. He's at school all day today, and some of his friends are jerks and they'll tease him and try to get a rise out of him - but he's a sensitive child and I know it will not go over well with him, right now while he is wounded. I wish I could take away the pain for him, and I know these are the hard lessons in life.....but what can I do-what can I say!?

Holidays Are Near

The holidays are riding upon us. I have decided to start my Christmas shopping just a little early this year, I actually started in October! A lot of the stuff is small & the kids didn't even ask for it, but I found it-thought it was cute & decided to just order it. The boys are already showing signs of excitement, it's rather adorable. I can't wait to spend this valuable time with them, this year Christmas week falls on my weeks with O&W....fantastic, that mean's I'll be home with them all week & get all that great time with all of them. The plans for X are still up in the air. I would have hoped we would have planned something with his mom by now, but we have not heard & B told me to not mention it, that it wasn't my responsibility to make sure they saw each other that it was hers-and I hear him, but I still care for X and I care about his needs and desires-whatever they may be, and maybe I am reaching.

Last night, at the baseball game-I walk up as the boys are all out in the outfield warming up. X is the closest to the fence that I am walking past to head towards the bleachers to take my seat. He sees me and says "MOM".....and it warmed my heart. I really am a lucky "mom" to be given the opportunity to raise two amazing bonus children. God knew what he was doing when he gave me these two crazy people.

So those are all good things, I bet you're wondering what I have to rant & rave about? Well, one thing I've noticed about social media is that there are so many people out there shaming others into donating to various Go Fund Me pages, they post the link on their page over and over again - begging or asking people to donate to this "good cause" and trust me, they all sound like good causes & I would never begrudge someone help if they really needed it - but the people asking, and making a fuss-if you look at the donors...they have not even donated. Maybe they feel they are doing their part by "putting it out there so more can see & more can give..." and that is their contribution, but the feeling of self gratification is what bugs me. Ah well. If that's my only complain this week I guess it's not so bad...but it's not, hahaha. Best Buy, I could write a book about how pissed I am at them right now!

xoxo, Lela